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i feel lke im at breaking point.. the thought to disappear has crossed my mind.

my mother is a fucking asshole. her pathetic excuse of a human, boyfriend.. i hope the bastard has aids. has the audacity to call me names. then she tells me shes sorry my father is my father and that this piece of shit should be my father. fuck her. i hope she dies and i can spit on her. stupid slut.

i want to get away.. i dont know what to do..
rndm thought.. did lj start all this social networking shit?? and why is social networking so.. i dont know what it is?

how much less complicated was life before it all. and before i dont know like everything.

those of a feather sleep together.

lying by ommision is still lying.
lying flat out is just bullshit.

i roll my eyes at it.

people dont change and its dumb to believe they do. im a silly girl for believing they do.

im silly girl for believing at one point it was about really about an us. i do believe everything on his end was a farce. i dont believe he didnt touch anyone else and thats why i was continuously asked. i really should go for an std test. disgusts me to think of what i may have been exposed to. he disgusts me.

never again leave a dream behind... not for anyone.

on a happy happy note. met a nice boy or reaquainted i should say. we went to swain together. articulate, passionate and sweet.. he owns a pharmacutical company. having a good time getting to know him.. kinda have butterflies. oh no.. silly girl stuff.

somethings work out amazingly. perfect timing.
its been said before but now its more than official. and im feeling absolutely fabulous!!

a little apprehensive about the idea of meeting people but i think itll be fun. better than what its been.

god.. i cant believe me. fucking rose coloured glasses. broke those motherfuckers into fifty.

bleed out. fuck that and fuck you. go fuck the lochness monster. im sure the fat jiggles really nice. god makes me wet just thinking about it.. wait no.. im going to throw up. make sure you have her carry a blanket around.

but yay me... yay for good friends, yay for new friends, yay for a new day!


Wipe the eyes and then let go
In the world I left behind
Shed a tear and let love go.
well over 2.5 yrs ago. no bullet and no blood splatter. i totally should have lived upto my statement.

30% of all dads out there dont realize theyre raising someone elses kid. ahah suckers

bit ago friend spoke of moving away.. i thought about it again today. it is rather tempting. i mean within a year i can have a good chunk saved and then the car will be paid off. i can have the house rented out and well i could probably have a job lined up. even if i stay here, thinking about everything is setting up rather well and they have been. with or without guido. which speaking of.. i bet my life itll be reading this. to him.. stop now aint worth your time and aint got nothing to do with you.


yay scott rossi
cry cry cry booo fucking hoo


omg seriously. its amusing how everything can be blamed on one thing.. and it isnt the one thing its being blamed on. whatever.

oh how rediculous.

tbc.
im so hc, i advertise.

Mar. 18th, 2007

Your Personality is Very Rare (INTP)

Your personality type is goofy, imaginative, relaxed, and brilliant.

Only about 4% of all people have your personality, including 2% of all women and 6% of all men
You are Introverted, Intuitive, Thinking, and Perceiving.

Dec. 16th, 2006

my stomach hurts bad.. i cant stop shaking. something.
sense of betrayal.. i dont know what to do.

its that time again.

red leather jacket
black & red polo sweaters
move in
new cell
new telli
ps3
diamond earings
right hand ring
new computer
day at a spa.. the full works.
perfection
change